Category Archives: Jealousy

The Metaphor of a MESS: How it Symbolizes EGO & What To Do To Deal With It

22 August 2017


This has been a topic I’ve avoided writing about for some time.

I’ve written about the “mess” I inherited & learned in early childhood but I haven’t written directly about how messes show up with others and how to deal with it in a way which is long-lasting and permanent.

So messes can show up in a dream in a variety of ways.

If there is a mess in a house it means there is something happening with the ego which is affecting the positive development of the self.

If there is a mess in a yard it means there is something negative happening which influences or is influenced by others in a more public way.

If there is a mess in a building or in office place then it is about how the ego is affecting productive development between people who are working together, in a profession or in any type of agreement or working arrangement.

A MESS in a dream means someone clearly has an ISSUE around the area, be it the Self, or the Work, or the Social Setting.

When someone has an issue it means there has been an early experience of trauma in that area and the memory of it is still really strong in the mind and affects the person regularly. It means they have a negative part of themself which shows up when they are afraid of something and this negative part creates a so-called MESS of some sort which has the effect of slowing or stopping the relationship, the progress, the work, etc.

When this is understood, then it is easy to help people through their fear-based trauma reaction by offering encouragement, reassurance, patience, kindness, etc. When the trust is re-built and the fear dissolved then work can continue in whatever area needed.

So if you dream of a big mess, in your house, or your work space, or your neighbourhood then you can start asking yourself, “Where in my life is the biggest mess?” and try to discern “Who am I having the biggest challenge with right now?” What is someone doing that is causing a big mess and what does it lead you to do?

When you can start to understand their fear and their ego-mess you can have increased patience and loving-kindness towards them.

Incredible challenges can be overcome with this approach.

Go ahead. Give it a try. And feel free to write about the experience in the comments below.

“Praise God for this fella” – the beauty of an Arizona Black Rattlesnake

I recently dreamed that I was really good at handling a rattlesnake so that it couldn’t hurt anyone. In the dream, someone else with a lot of confidence but lacking competence also wanted to handle the snake but she did so in such a way that it got agitated and was squirming ready to bite or attach.

This dream has left me awe-struck at the beauty of the dreamworld, the perfection with with dreams are designed.

Not knowing much about black rattlesnakes before this dream I researched them a bit online and found this great video. There’s lots to learn about these beauties but here are a few which stick out because I saw these qualities about the snake in the dream even before I learned they have these real qualities in real life.

  1. The name is Black Arizona Rattlesnake – This is interesting because the “blacker-than-black” quality of the snake stood out for me in the dream and helped me in my research afterwards. The Black Rattlesnake lives in Arizona and for me this is one of the places on earth which I really want to experience in real life. But symbolically, Arizona is a warm country full of natural mystery and wonderment so the Black Rattlesnake from Arizona is inviting me in my dream to experience the warmth of wonderment.
  2. These snakes like to curl up – In the dream, the snake was curled up at the beginning and I discovered that in real life these snakes do like to curl up and hide out waiting for their next meal. If they sense a threat they will retreat before resorting to attack. They are actually mild-mannered snakes as you’ll see from this video. They only start their rattle going if they cannot escape and they will shake their rattle until they lunge and bite. They don’t want to attack though and if given the chance will retreat instead of attack.
  3. Handling them with care lessons the risk of attack – In the dream, someone provokes the snake and it tries to bite my hand but I am skilled at dealing with it and I demonstrate how I can take a fang to the hand without getting bit and can remove the fangs while calming the snake. The other person takes the snake and holds it high over her head, flaunting that she believes she knows best. However this agitates the snake and it prepares to bite.

What I like about learning about the Arizona Black Rattlesnake is that I discovered that even though it is poisonous a bite from it would be painful but not likely lethal. I also liked learning that it is a docile creature who retreats when feeling threatened and only attacks if provoked.

The dream was a good lesson for me and a good reminder that sometimes I can be relating to someone who thinks they know what they are doing even when they do not and this can cause hurt to a lot of people.

Someone wise said to me recently that, “Hurt people will hurt people.” And that is what this dream is about.

Someone who has a lot of confidence but not a lot of competence is likely hurting inside and their actions result in hurting others.

Someone like that would benefit from therapy.

How To Handle Snake-like Behaviour in Others

01 July 2017

A while back I dreamed of handling a blacker-than-black rattlesnake. Even though the snake was poisonous and trying to bite I could handle it easy like an expert. Someone else tried to show off and say they could handle rattlesnakes too but when they tried they realized they couldn’t. In the dream the snake gave me a tiny bite on my hand but I shook it off with no issues.

A dream like this is one of my favourites to deal with because it deals with a snake, which is a perfect symbol for change & transformation.


In the dream, I am teaching others how to handle rattlesnakes. That means in real life I have an ability to handle a lot of change & transformation AND have the ability to teach others.


So that is what I’m setting out to do in this post.


To begin, it’s useful to think of the difference between a rattlesnake and other poisounous snakes. The rattle makes them very different. They expect that if they taunt their target with the ominous shake of the rattle then the target will either flee or freeze. If the flee, so be it. If they freeze, they become lunch.


So in real life, the rattle of a snake is like the rattle of someone negative making threats and “noise” to try to create a fear response in its target. There are some people, like narcissists, who get a thrill over shaking things up and generating fear in others.


In the dream, the rattle doesn’t turn me away and it doesn’t turn my mom away either. So that means that this gift was given to me by her. It’s something I inherited from her.


The problem in the dream is that she wants to match or surpass my skills and she can’t.


People in dreams are not always about the people in real life. When a person shows up in an dream it can be about a part of the dreamer that is similiar to the character in the dream. So this dream with my mom does not mean it is really about her in real life, although that may be one possibility.


In the dream I handle the snake well and in real life people who have snake-like tendencies often have a lot of jealousy. They often wait and then pounce on prey when least expected and they try to bring others into an fight. It comes from a place of fear, fear of losing something like a position. If they see someone else who they perceive as threatening their position they can attack with poison to try to bring the person down.


There’s not too much to get worried about in a dream or real life scenario with snake-like people. The key is to just be flexible and willing to change and adapt. In this way, new strengths are developed and old skills are called on to deal with the new situation.


When a snake shows up in your dream you can start asking yourself, “Where in my life is there some room for growth, transformation and Change?”

You might be surprised.


Dream: Crowded trailer, family conflict, resolution

11 June 2017

In the dream, I’m visiting friends in a trailer for several days. On the last day things happen which suddenly make conditions so cramped and as I’m trying to leave things just get so claustrophobic and I start making mistakes.

Someone cooks all the beans instead of keeping them in the cans. Someone tries to pack things to help but they go into the wrong box. Someone tries to help by giving me soap but I get the soap in my food and when I try to wash it off I interrupt someone with jealousy issues. This causes the Jealousy-Person to over-react and cause a great commotion in the family. Then they are all in a hustle trying to calm things down.

I watch it all and see how the Jealousy-Person controls the family but can’t control me.

I am questioned and at first my answers upset the Jealousy-Person because I’m not hiding her bad behaviour but the truth of my words make people realize what’s going on. They stop interrogating me. I tell them that I see nothing wrong with the mother and it is the daughter who is causing problems and if she continues I will stop talking to her.

This shocks them because it seems exclusive but in fact when someone has continued bad behaviour time and space is needed in order to heal.

Soon afterwards I see the two family members who were in greatest conflict sitting with a member of a Local Spiritual Assembly member and calmly working through a resolution. I feel like I want to be in the meeting since it was my being there which caused the uproar but then I realize it has nothing to do with me and I just find a quiet corner on a stair case and I say prayers for them.

They come out of the meeting both appearing content with the resolution and they continue on through through the day.

But for me, the space is so crowded I cannot think of what to do next. All I want is to just get up and drive away immediately. But I know that wouldn’t be good because Gracie is with me and there are valuable things for us to collect. So I have to figure out how to be in that cluttered volitile environment, retrieve my belongings and get out while still remaining strong.

As I’m praying I’m asking my True Self what is the best solution here. Answers come.

Handling Jealousy

24 March 2017
This is an interesting dream which shows how some people act when they feel jealous. Jealous is the feeling which comes from fear of losing something someone has like a certain position in a company or family. Envy is similar but different and comes from the feeling of wanting something that someone doesn’t have and it may not even be God’s Will for them to have. The solution to dealing with someone who has a lot of jealousy is to include them. If they do not respond positively to the opportunity then you can leave them to themselves.
Here is an example of a dream where someone had a lot of jealousy and then went into a temper-tantrum when they didn’t get their own way and felt left out even though others were trying to include them.
In the dream I’m moving into a new house although I’m not altogether happy with it. It’s large enough, which is good, but it’s older than I like and it seems I have no money for renovations to even bring the beauty in the old out. I also have no choice of furniture and for a while am trying to move in a dresser & desk which have broken drawers. Finally someone (my mom?) sees they are broken & unsuitable and she orders a bunch of new furniture from a liquidation warehouse.
I bring them upstairs to my room which is appears I am sharing with my sister although I somehow sense it won’t be as bad as I fear.
Someone (my aunt?) goes in to have a bath & I give her instructions because one of the pipes & faucets leak.
I lay out towels to catch the water and show her how.
Then back downstairs a friend comes over and joins my sister & I in an activity. At some point I sense my sister’s episode coming out. I step in to ask some questions and say a few things so that it protects my friend. A.C. becomes enraged at me and she screams as she runs upstairs. From upstairs she hollars and stomps around crying.
I try to console my friend saying it had nothing to do with any of us, it was just her own issue and if we leave her to herself she will recover and come back down in time.
The friend is clearly confused but also believes me.
We set about to do something in the kitchen/dining room area.